Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize