She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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