Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
