Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
