Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize
