she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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