quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
