with your own penis?
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
