Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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