Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Randomize
