My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
