i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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