whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
