After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Randomize