brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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