Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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