Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Randomize
