Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
