we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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