Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
