He asked to "fluff my boner.."
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
