dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Randomize