we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize