And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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