He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
