I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Randomize