we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize