I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Randomize
