Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
He passed out mid-signature
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
