I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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