AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
My life is pants optional.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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