yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
