yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Houston, we have a squirter
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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