allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
