Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I need to sanitize my soul.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
