Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
