she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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