Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
