we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize