Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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