you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
