Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
