Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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