Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
