just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
