Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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