yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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