it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
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