3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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