Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
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