I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
